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Why Parents Drink

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Suki, Apr 29, 2007.

  1. Suki

    Suki Little Dog

    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an envelope,[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]Propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to "Dad."[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with trembling hands [/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]and read the letter.[/FONT]

    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]Dear Dad:[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]Elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]Mom and you.[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing,[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]Tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]I am. But it's not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant.[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]Stacy said that we will be very happy.[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]winter. We share a dream of having many more children. Stacy has[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone.[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy. In the meantime we[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better.[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]She deserves it. [/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself.[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know [/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]your grandchildren.[/FONT]

    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]Love, [/FONT]

    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]Your Son John[/FONT]

    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house. I just[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than a report [/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]card that's in my center desk drawer.[/FONT]
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Sans Serif]I love you. Call me when it's safe to come home.[/FONT]
  2. JoeFeezy

    JoeFeezy Puppy

    Hell yeah. That is hilarious.
  3. MercedesMama

    MercedesMama Big Dog

    Haha! That's a good one.

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