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I will see you again sweet girl. RIP Raven, I love you.

Discussion in 'Memorials' started by ETRaven2, Oct 8, 2017.

  1. ETRaven2

    ETRaven2 Big Dog

    I know it's been a really long time. I've been chugging along as a single parent, am in nursing school and haven't had a second to shit, let alone post.
    However, just wanted to update, and possibly ask for some support. I put my heart dog, Raven, down September 17 at 3:39pm. I can't even, oh my God, I miss her so bad.
    For those that don't know, Raven was a rescued as a puppy from a hoarding type situation. She was a nightmare and completely reactive, we flunked puppy class because she hated other dogs even at 4 months. We ended up doing online, home training and reactivity work (Denise Fenzi stuff) and we had a really great behaviorist working with us as well. We had systems in place to keep her and others safe and all was going well. However, it takes ONE time, ONE slip up. And it happened. Raven bit a child, tore her leg up actually. It was a friend of my 8 year old daughter. I wasn't home at the time, my kids' Dad was at the house and did not secure the dog. Friend came in all crazy, squealing, like little girls do, and Ray felt threatened, went after her.
    I got home to a bloody mess. Long story short, I threw the little girl into my car, rushed her to her parents and offered to drive them all to the ER. They declined. Once I got them situated, I came home, packed up my baby girl, my partner, my TV buddy, my animal that knows exactly what I'm thinking, the dog that would walk through fire to please me and drove her to the ER Vet (it was a Sunday) to have her euthanized. That's as far as I can type/talk about this. My effing heart hurts. Sad is not even the word. I am heart broken.
    Why did I make the decision? Because I knew in my heart it was the right thing. All variables together, it was the best for my Raven. I did it that day, because believe it or not, I was in shock and acting completely logical, the situation hadn't hit my heart yet. That, and I knew that if I waited until the following day, I'm not sure that I would've gone through with euthanasia. My heart would've taken over.
    So, I'm back, a hot mess and would love some advice on how to heal from this. It's been 3 weeks and I can't even take her collar out of my purse. My mom came over and cleaned up all her stuff and put it in a box for me. I miss her at night, I miss her in the morning, I miss her when I go to leave and tell her to be a good girl and I'll be back soon. I miss her being my shadow. She was such a problem child, but I think that makes it even harder sometimes. We worked so hard together and had this unbreakable bond.
    I just kept telling her that I would see her again. I promised her I'd see her again. And with that I can't see through my tears, so I'm gonna stop. Here she is, my little nugget.

    Attached Files:

  2. Nat Ursula

    Nat Ursula Good Dog

    OMG, I'm so sorry to hear about all of this. I hope the little girl will be okay. It will take time for you to get over your loss. Clearly you loved Raven and tried to give her a good life.
    Capt. Roxy and ETRaven2 like this.
  3. ETRaven2

    ETRaven2 Big Dog

    Thank you for the kind words Nat. In all my grief writing that, I forgot to update about the little girl. She is doing fine, only had superficial damage, no muscles or arteries were involved (thank God). We baked her cupcakes and took her flowers that next day and I've been following up regularly. The parents have been so nice about it. They're dog people, so I think they are trying to understand better than most.
    Capt. Roxy likes this.
  4. Pitbullmom1

    Pitbullmom1 Big Dog

    So sorry for your loss.
    Nat Ursula and ETRaven2 like this.
  5. ETRaven2

    ETRaven2 Big Dog

    Should mention too, that when asked Raven's breed....the answer was "mutt" bc that's what she was. Further, I "blame"** the BC gene for making her so neurotic.
    **blame is not the right word but cannot think of a more appropriate one. Brain is fried from A&P II homework.
    Nat Ursula likes this.
  6. Nat Ursula

    Nat Ursula Good Dog

    Whew, what a relief.
    ETRaven2 and Capt. Roxy like this.
  7. Michele

    Michele Chi Super Dog Staff Member Administrator

    Sorry for your loss
    Capt. Roxy, ETRaven2 and Nat Ursula like this.
  8. Capt. Roxy

    Capt. Roxy Good Dog Premium Member

    I am so sorry for your loss... *HUG*
    ETRaven2 and Nat Ursula like this.
  9. Madeleinemom

    Madeleinemom MS Bites, My Dog Didn't Staff Member Super Moderator

    I am glad that the little girl will be o.k. And I am sorry for your loss; it is hard to PTS a beloved dog, but surely especially so, when you have to make the decision in these circumstances. RIP, Raven.
    Capt. Roxy, ETRaven2 and Nat Ursula like this.
  10. ETRaven2

    ETRaven2 Big Dog

    Thank you all, for the support and kind words.
    Capt. Roxy and Madeleinemom like this.
  11. steve07

    steve07 Good Dog Premium Member

    So sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine. However IMO it was the right thing to do
    Nat Ursula, Capt. Roxy and ETRaven2 like this.
  12. ETRaven2

    ETRaven2 Big Dog

    Absolutely, it was the right thing. Reflecting, I should've done it sooner. Her reactivity was getting worse with age, not better. Mine is a cautionary tale.
  13. EstyEsty

    EstyEsty Little Dog

    So sorry to hear about you having to put your girl to sleep. You did the right thing. I too had to put my first pit, Paris Hilton to sleep. She was my everything...I had her 11 years and I took her everywhere she was so calm.....but she got cancer and our vet did surgery and got all of the tumor.... But he warned me that it was the bad, aggressive cancer. 6 months later she was breathing pretty hard one nite so the next day I took her in.....and I knew.....it had spread to her lungs.... They said she might live another 2 months.....I told her that night as we layed together in the living room that I would not let her suffer....
    The next am she died in my arms.. what saved me that horrible day was that I bought another white female pit. If I hadn't done that I know it would have been worse! Now I have Peetie but....even right now I am crying over Paris. It's been a little over a year..... It's hard.....just take it one day at a time till you meet at the Rainbow bridge....
    ETRaven2 and Nat Ursula like this.
  14. EstyEsty

    EstyEsty Little Dog

    ETRaven2 and Nat Ursula like this.
  15. _unoriginal

    _unoriginal Cow Dog

    ETRaven, I remember posting with you years ago. I'm so sorry you had to make this decision but you absolutely made the right one. You did the right thing for Raven by letting her go when you did instead of waiting until she was possibly confiscated and euthanized by strangers. I'm so sorry though, I know your heart is hurting but you did the best you could for her.

    You'll heal and move on. Just give yourself time to grieve.

    Rest in paradise with no more fear, Raven.
    ETRaven2 and Nat Ursula like this.
  16. Rezbull

    Rezbull Puppy

    My deepest of condolences, and sentiments offered. I do believe you've done the right thing in retrospect of the possibility of the condition only worsening as displayed. I'm certain that in Ravens case, being in her own skin wasn't always easy due to the experience early in being that she was a victim of abuse as mentioned.( I have no likes for the hoarding types.)

    The more I research into the many bulls in the media and elsewhere that became problematic regardless of the degree, I find most usually were also victims one way or another, due to their upbringing of unknown conditions and backgrounds including genetics.

    Having children, I've held a zero tolerance policy and can only commend you for setting example for any future readers.

    It's just not worth the risk- children can't be replaced, but dogs can be substituted. There's always a sound dog somewhere else in need of rescue.

    R.I.P. Raven
    ETRaven2 and EstyEsty like this.
  17. brindle

    brindle Little Dog

    I am sorry for your loss... RIP Raven. You did the right thing, but it is a hard choice. Still, you don't want to risk another bite and I am glad the little girl is ok.

    Time will help you heal and when it feels right, I hope you get another dog companion.
    Nat Ursula and ETRaven2 like this.
  18. ETRaven2

    ETRaven2 Big Dog

    Thanks Brindle. As you know, I got an Am Bully rehome last month. It was a little soon for my liking, but the poor puppy was in need of help. And I could, so I intervened.
    I still miss Raven so much. My parents have her litter mate, Gemma. We went there for Thanksgiving and, of course, Gemma reminded me of my Ray. It was hard to watch her at times. But, I just know Raven is always going to have that little piece of my heart reserved just for her. Doesn't mean I love Brooklyn any less, at all. Brooklyn has definitely helped our family (immediate and extended) heal. She was a good outcome to a really shitty situation.
    I do follow up with the little girl's mom regularly, even now. Just ask how she is and keep it really short. My fear (besides injury) was that the poor child was going to be afraid of dogs forever. I'm grateful that it isn't the case. Her mom told me that the only thing the little girl has said about strange dogs is that from now on she's going to be more careful and mindful around them. Smart kid.
    Nat Ursula likes this.
  19. brindle

    brindle Little Dog

    Yes, I had posted here before I saw that you got the pup. She needed a home and it has been a good thing for all. I had to put my old pit bull to sleep almost 3 yrs ago at age 14, she had cancer, and I still miss her so much. I could not stand the empty house and thus I got a pup 6 months later, but she was/is the pup from hell and nothing like my wonderful old dog. So I was not so lucky, and live with a difficult dog these days.

    It hurts so much when you lose a dog you have lived with and loved with all your heart and a part of you never gets over it. Time helps, but you never forget them and they take a piece of your heart with them. You're lucky you found Brooklyn, she's a nice pup and you'll have fun with her.

    Good thing the little girl is ok and that she has learned to be more careful around dogs now. It could have been far worse, lucky she had sensible parents too.
    Nat Ursula and ETRaven2 like this.
  20. ETRaven2

    ETRaven2 Big Dog

    I did get extremely lucky with Brooklyn. Her old owners made it sound like I was inheriting another "challenge", but it could be farther from the truth. The aggressive streak they spoke of is normal puppy crap and she's housebreaking just fine. She's a really confident little shit, and I am having a lot of fun with that. It's a welcomed change of pace from a fearful dog.
    Nat Ursula and Worg like this.

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