10. Get out the nachos and cheese, crank up the macarena on the stereo!

9. Play "hide in the dryer" with the cat. Comes out nice & fluffy.

8. Log on the the Internet, answer e-mail from adoring fans.

7. Check the couch cushions for last nights leftovers...

6. Check out the bisexual cross-dressers and the women who love them...up next on Geraldo!

5. Work on those memoirs...Chapter 2, "The day I found out I was a dog."

4. Call up the neighbors, pant heavily into the phone...

3. Practice looking excited when the people get home.

2. Return Bill's phone call...help him out with the Whitewater thing...

1. Make faces at the neighbors rotweiller...moron!